Every woman I’ve spoken to has a feature she’d like to change given the chance. I don’t know why it comes up in conversation so much, but somehow it does. I’ll admit my physical flaw or weakness to you, if you will to me. “If you could magically change or improve any part of your body, what would it be?” I don’t know how many times I’ve heard that question. It might be worded differently, but the subtext is always the same. “What part of you don’t you like”.
I’ve heard little girls doing it. I’ve done it as a teenager and college student. I’m sad to say that as a mother in my mid 30s I still take part in this behavior occasionally. I know it’s destructive. I know it’s reinforcing that I’m not good enough. I know it’s showing my two young girls that it’s okay to find flaws with your personal appearance. Oddly enough, the women I find beautiful aren’t picture perfect. There is something unconventional about them.
Sarah Jessica Parker was told to get a nose job prior to her Sex and the City days. She refused, saying that today’s stars are “airbrushed, stripped of any quirks and defining features”, making them look “common”. I admire the strength of these women to keep their unique features. I agree with Sara Jessica Parker, all the younger women who have lots of plastic surgery may be pretty, but are unremarkable.
I’ve learned to love the bump on my nose and my freckles. I wish I could say the same for my thick ankles. I’ve come to terms with them knowing I can’t change them. They’re a part of me. I’ve also learned that the more I think about what I don’t like, or imagine what I’d like to change, I continue to be unhappy with my appearance. I foster an overall feeling of unhappiness. This is not a trait I’d like to perpetuate. I’m happiest knowing that I am a unique person. It’s okay that I never grace the cover of a magazine, or make it on the silver screen. I’m okay just being me. It’s taken years to get to the point where I like being me.
I hope that when I turn 60, I can be as fabulous as another amazing non traditional beauty: Angelica Huston.